Using Facebook as a Force for Good this Lent, Part 3: Fasting

Intro:

The purpose of putting our smartphones on grayscale for Lent is to choose a form of Lenten penance that requires sacrifice while also allowing us to regain an element of thoughtfulness and recollection in our use of these devices, which can distract us from purposeful Christian lives. However, while this Lenten resolution is a good first step, it may not "solve" all our usage struggles.

Perhaps that is why so many people, instead of grayscale, choose other specific resolutions, such as giving up online shopping or social media. At times, we may feel that it the struggles come with impulse control in the little bits of time we have free. We look for distractions on our phone, and find them easily, but we are left feeling that online window-shopping or mindless social media scrolling was not the best use of our time. It lacked a sense of purpose and increased our sense of a lack of impulse control or meaning in our usage.

The question for today is how we might approach Facebook during Lent, using it as a force for good, rather than mindless, time-filling, quasi-entertainment. We consider this question with the traditional Lenten penances in mind: prayer, fasting, and almsgiving and offer concrete suggestions for using Facebook well this Lent, rather than simply giving it up.

Fasting:

The Lenten practice of fasting is, first and foremost, about food. The fasting that we still practice on Ash Wednesday and Good Friday consists of only one full meal and two smaller snacks. Until the Lent of 1967, this fast was kept on all the days of Lent (excepting solemnities). The changes to penitential practice for Lent in the United States now allow for a much broader interpretation of fasting, and people voluntarily choose to "give up" or fast from various foods or items during Lent.

The idea of going grayscale for Lent is about fasting from the color on our screens, and, like the traditional practice of fasting, it allows us to regain a sort of thoughtfulness or recollection that comes from a constant reminder. Every time we see our phones, we recognize that they look different. Many other people choose to fast from social media, such as Facebook, Twitter, or Instagram. There are various good reasons to consider such a fast, as well as other reasons to avoid this fast.

First, it is helpful to recognize that the traditional fasting encourages abstaining from something that is fundamentally good for us; food is necessary for our very survival. Lenten resolutions may allow us to work on sin struggles, but our Lenten sacrifices should not be about "giving up" a particular sin. For example, if we struggle with gossip, we should try to give that up during Lent, but not as a Lenten resolution. Rather, we should always be making efforts to combat that sin, not looking to take a 40 day break from it before we plunge back in.

So, when it comes to Facebook, a good question for examination is whether it regularly causes us to sin or is sometimes a near occasion of sin causing a struggle. If we recognize that we become insensitive, rude, or careless on Facebook, insulting others perhaps, or demeaning them, or using Facebook as a way to make a name for ourself, presenting ourselves as amazing people, then Facebook itself may be an occasion for sin for us, and we may need to give it up - not for Lent, but forever!

However, we may see that Facebook helps us to maintain long-distance relationships with family or friends, to find ways to help those around us in need, allows us to feel supported by others, and sometimes to engage in meaningful conversations on important topics. That doesn't mean we might not sometimes struggle with wanting to make rude remarks or wanting to show off our kids. But, especially if we are using it purposefully and thoughtfully, Facebook does not have to be an occasion of sin, and fasting from such a good may not be the best Lenten resolution for us. It may, rather, contribute to our feeling isolated from others.

Nonetheless, we may still recognize some problems with how we use this "good." Like food, we may turn to it when we're bored for entertainment. We may fill our bits of time with it, absent-mindedly looking through it when we might do other more productive or prayerful things. In such cases, there can be value in adopting some discipline here. In addition to using Facebook as a force for good by intentionally looking for almsgiving and prayer opportunities, we may want to limit our time, by setting a screen time limit on our phones or by purposefully setting aside a set time period designated to social media. We often think in terms of "all or nothing," but sometimes the best solution is, instead, something thoughtful and intentional. If we have our phones set to grayscale, we will already find less pull and enjoyment from social media, such as Facebook. Thus, rather than simply giving up Facebook, we may want to discipline our use of it, making it a force for good guided by the Lenten practices of fasting, prayer, and almsgiving.

Using Facebook as a Force for Good this Lent, Part 2: Prayer

Intro:

The purpose of putting our smartphones on grayscale for Lent is to choose a form of Lenten penance that requires sacrifice while also allowing us to regain an element of thoughtfulness and recollection in our use of these devices, which can distract us from purposeful Christian lives. However, while this Lenten resolution is a good first step, it may not "solve" all our usage struggles.

Perhaps that is why so many people, instead of grayscale, choose other specific resolutions, such as giving up online shopping or social media. At times, we may feel that it the struggles come with impulse control in the little bits of time we have free. We look for distractions on our phone, and find them easily, but we are left feeling that online window-shopping or mindless social media scrolling was not the best use of our time. It lacked a sense of purpose and increased our sense of a lack of impulse control or meaning in our usage.

The question for today is how we might approach Facebook during Lent, using it as a force for good, rather than mindless, time-filling, quasi-entertainment. We consider this question with the traditional Lenten penances in mind: prayer, fasting, and almsgiving and offer concrete suggestions for using Facebook well this Lent, rather than simply giving it up.

Prayer:

Prayer is one of the most basic prayer practices of Lent. Of course, Lent should not be the only time of the year when we make efforts in our prayer life. And yet, it is a special time where we may take on extra or different prayer practices than usual, such as adding a daily Rosary, attending daily Mass, or reflecting on the daily Mass readings. If we are not adding anything specifically, we may try to be more intentional about prioritizing our prayer or using our times of prayer well.

While Facebook may not be the first forum we think of when it comes to prayer, there certainly is no shortage of opportunity for prayer on Facebook. If we have faithful Catholic friends, we have probably at some point, possibly even frequently, encountered prayer requests on Facebook. In fact, even those who are not regular churchgoers will occasionally request prayers or respond to friends' posts by noting that they are praying for them.

Perhaps no lie is so common among Christians as the false promise to say a prayer for someone. The falsehood may not be intentional, but, especially if we are quickly scrolling through posts, we may intend to pray for someone and then fail to do so. Or we may recognize that someone seems to be in need of prayers, even if not requesting them, and we want to pray for them later in the day but forget.

Lent is a wonderful opportunity to use Facebook as a force for good by actually praying for those who ask for it or would seem to benefit from it. And if we find ourselves getting frustrated by friends on Facebook, perhaps for their political postings or unkind comments to ourselves or others, we should make an extra effort to pray for them during Lent. Here are some ideas about how to be more intentional about prayer on Facebook.

First, if someone is requesting prayers, let's pray for them. Stop the scrolling, pause for a minute, and immediately say a prayer. There are many quick prayers that we can say mentally, such as: "Lord, for Michelle as she mourns the loss of her father-in-law and for the repose of his soul: Hail Mary..." Or, "Dear God, for my friend Nicole and her son who has a high fever right now: Our Father..." Again, "For Tom, who was just in a car accident, may his angel keep him safe: Angel of God, Tom's guardian dear..." It is great to choose a prayer in advance, such as the Memorare or, the ancient (and slightly briefer) prayer Sub Tuum Praesidium. If we are prepared, we can easily pause and say a prayer for the person in need, and, then, when we are finished with the prayer, we can comment on the friend's post: "Just said a Hail Mary for you guys. Hope your son gets better soon!" It lets the person know that we really did say a prayer for them!

Second, for those who aren't requesting prayers, but clearly have some need, whether it's because of a bad day in general or a specific challenge they are facing. There are also those who seem to be negative, angry, or purposely antagonistic toward others in their comments or posts. For such occasions, it's probably best NOT to let them know they have our prayers, as that may simply seem to be sarcastic or offensive. And yet, we can still pray for them, using the same procedure as above. Pausing and offering a prayer right then and there takes our concern or frustration and turns it toward God, sharing our worries in a way that can help us to grow closer to God during Lent and maybe also help our friends who are struggling.

Third, if we are incorporating specific prayer practices this Lent, such as a daily Rosary, it is a good idea to keep a list of intentions on a slip of paper in our pocket or on the notes section of our phone. This way we can keep track of our friends in need of prayer and remember them at another time of the day. Praying for others in need is a great way to strengthen the body of Christ, and we will find it easier to pray for friends if we have some written reminder of these intentions.

Finally, what about requesting prayers for ourselves or others? This is usually a good idea, so long as we don't overdo it; some people may weary of constant requests for prayers for ourselves or others.  Asking for prayers should not be a way of seeking attention; we should ask for prayers only if we really desire the prayers of others for a particular situation. If we believe in the power of prayer and know that we have good Catholic friends who will pray for us, it is a good idea to ask for prayers for difficult situations, such as our own loss of a loved one, the serious illness of a child, etc. We also may see benefit in asking for prayers for someone else that we know is in need, but may not believe in prayer or want to ask for prayers so publicly. In such cases, it's good to ask permission, and generally not to name the person if we know they don't want attention this way.

Prayer may not be the first thought that pops into our head when we think of Facebook, but there are many invitations to do so when we are more recollected and intentional in our use of Facebook. We know we have friends facing difficult situations, writing rude remarks, celebrating a birthday, or having a rough day. Rather than zipping through these posts, we can take the time to pause and offer specific prayers for these friends. We can commit to remembering them in our prayer later in the day as well. And we can be willing to open ourselves to others praying for us in our times of need. By embracing this opportunity for prayer, we can use Facebook as a force for good this Lent.

Using Facebook as a Force for Good this Lent, Part 1: Almsgiving

Intro:

The purpose of putting our smartphones on grayscale for Lent is to choose a form of Lenten penance that requires sacrifice while also allowing us to regain an element of thoughtfulness and recollection in our use of these devices, which can distract us from purposeful Christian lives. However, while this Lenten resolution is a good first step, it may not "solve" all our usage struggles.

Perhaps that is why so many people, instead of grayscale, choose other specific resolutions, such as giving up online shopping or social media. At times, we may feel that it the struggles come with impulse control in the little bits of time we have free. We look for distractions on our phone, and find them easily, but we are left feeling that online window-shopping or mindless social media scrolling was not the best use of our time. It lacked a sense of purpose and increased our sense of a lack of impulse control or meaning in our usage.

The question for today is how we might approach Facebook during Lent, using it as a force for good, rather than mindless, time-filling, quasi-entertainment. We consider this question with the traditional Lenten penances in mind: prayer, fasting, and almsgiving and offer concrete suggestions for using Facebook well this Lent, rather than simply giving it up.

Almsgiving:

Fundamentally, almsgiving is about giving money directly to the poorest in need of basic resources. During Lent especially, we see this giving as made possible by our own sacrifices of little comforts that we can give up for a time in order to focus on others. Facebook is currently used for various fundraisers, providing us with opportunities to donate money. However, we can find many other important opportunities simply by paying attention to our friends' situations and needs.

The idea of almsgiving can be extended to include the corporal and spiritual works of mercy, and each day, if we are attentive and reflective as we look through the posts of our friends and acquaintances, we will see openings to perform these works. Just recently, members of my family (including myself) had flu, and my husband posted about it on Facebook. I was moved by a number of friends who reached out to me to offer picking up groceries, dropping off Tylenol, and helping with rides for my children. And I was grateful to the friend who dropped off a meal, groceries, and Tylenol for our family.

Each day, as we scroll through Facebook, we will find people mourning the loss of a loved one, struggling to overcome illness, frustrated by logistics of family life, adjusting to a new baby, or going through some other hard times. Rather than casually passing by these posts, we can use them as a way to practice works of mercy during this season of Lent. To be more concrete, I suggest choosing at least one per week to address off Facebook, in real life, as we might say. Such actions would include sending a real, physical sympathy card or buying flowers for someone who has lost a family member, dropping off food for a sick family or family with a new baby, offering a ride to basketball practice for someone struggling with logistics, or sending some cash to someone who seems to be struggling financially.

There may be times, due to our own family circumstances, where we feel limited in our capabilities to reach out in charitable acts. While mailing a thoughtful card may be a possibility, making a meal or offering to watch someone's children may be untenable. However, during those times (including Lent) where we find such obstacles to physical works of mercy, we can still use Facebook as a force for good by offering encouraging words and making affirming, positive comments that express our concern and support for our friends with current challenges.

Because of Facebook, we often know events, including difficulties, that we might not otherwise hear about it. This Lent is a great time to put into practice the idea of almsgiving, using these posts as openings to reach out, inconveniencing ourselves to assist those in need and support those who could benefit. When we make such a choice in our use of Facebook, we can take it beyond mindless distraction to purposeful penance, using it as a force for good this Lent.

The Mid-Lent Struggle of Loathing Resolutions

Today is Thursday of the hundredth week of Lent. No, not really, because of course there are not that many weeks in Lent. But somehow, even when the sun finally shines again and the weather is warming up, there becomes a point where Lenten resolutions can feel like kind of a drag. We wonder how much longer we can handle living a life that's missing some of our favorite things.

In the beginning of Lent, there's some initial enthusiasm. We want to be better people. We want to grow closer to God. We want to use our Lenten penance to prepare for Easter. We are inspired by the people around us who share these goals. It may be hard, but we can persevere in those early days because of the beauty we find in the potential of the Lenten season.

Sometimes, we even start to see that habits are formed. Suddenly not eating between meals becomes the default; we don't even think about it that much. That extra prayer time becomes simply a part of our life. We feel like we are growing in virtue, exercising self-control, and living a Lent that will help us rejoice at Easter.

Then, there are other Lenten resolutions that just continue to be challenging...or possibly even annoying.

Going grayscale on my phone is meant to address the sort of mindless impulsivity that can lead me to do unproductive things when I could be using my time better. I'm sure we all have our unique downfalls when it comes to temperance issues and phone use. Mine tend in the direction of online shopping (including that in which I never actually purchase anything) and social media.

For these two issues, going grayscale does seem a direct affront. Online shopping is hard to do without color, and social media just isn't as fun. But grayscale doesn't actually prevent my doing these things, and I can sympathize with people who simply give up online shopping or social media. This approach is an even more direct affront, and possibly it brings better results. Going grayscale does not prevent me from using my phone, it just makes it really frustrating and boring.

This is the time of Lent where I start to struggle with grayscale, wanting to use the triple-click feature to switch into color for one second to check what a photo looks like before I post it. After all, that's more time-advantageous than pulling out my computer (which is still on color), and I don't want to be legalistic about being grayscale. And then, let's be honest, I do start using my computer more during Lent when my phone is on grayscale, not unlike drinking lots of tea if you've given up coffee. It's one of those Lenten resolution workarounds, and I always realize how much more efficient it is to use a computer for certain tasks anyway.

So, going grayscale for Lent is not one of those sacrifices that gets easier. It just starts to get annoying, and I start reevaluating the usefulness of it as a penance. Is it helping me to grow in temperance? Is it helping me to focus more on God during this Lenten season? Is it facilitating extra time for prayer? Or, is it humbling me, making me realize that even sticking to a resolution doesn't guarantee "winning" at Lent?

These questions - however painful - are just the sorts of questions we want to ask ourselves at this point in Lent. It's a great time to renew the interior penitential sentiment that we want to accompany our resolutions. We can pray for God to grant us a sense of compunction. We remind ourselves why we chose such a penance as this; we want to master our phones and not the other way around. Phones are our tools, and we are at God's service in all of our actions. Going grayscale is not an invitation to walk around miserable and come to hate Lent; it is an opportunity to refocus on what matters, to slow down our mind so we can grow in recollection and awareness of our sins and need for God.

Grayscale will continue to be lame for the next hundred weeks of Lent. No, not really, because there isn't that much time left to Lent! Whether we feel like it or not, we are in the final half of this season of penitential preparation. It is time to remind ourselves why we undertook such a Lenten resolution, to "set our faces" toward Jerusalem and what lies ahead - the passion, death, and resurrection of Jesus Christ. It won't make grayscale super-awesome and fun, but renewing our efforts by remembering our purpose will help us to get through these final weeks of Lent in a positive way.

Why You Should Consider Putting Your Phone on Grayscale This Lent

In the Lent of 2018, I decided to do something a bit unconventional as a Lenten resolution. I put my iPhone on grayscale. Now I'm back for another round of going gray for Lent. Let me share with you some reasons why you might consider putting your phone on grayscale this Lent.

You love your phone.

Your phone is great. It helps you stay in touch with family and friends, both near and far away. It is amazing to be able to take a cute picture of your toddler, proud of his latest mess, and send it to your mom in Iowa. It is so convenient to order a new pair of sneakers online for your kid and have them arrive within two days. It is a nice break to check social media and post messages to your friends who are celebrating birthdays that day. It is awesome to set a timer so you can remember to change your load of laundry right when the washer ends. It's so nice to be able to pull up GPS when you get lost on your way to a place you haven't been in awhile. And having access to prayer apps and Scripture on your phone is awesome too.

Your phone is useful, convenient, and yes, entertaining. It is a powerful tool that quickly becomes a part of life. For those of us used to using a smartphone, it may be hard to imagine ever going back to life without one. But the fact that you love your phone is a reason to put it on grayscale for Lent. The purpose of Lent is not to give up sins, as those you should be trying to give up all the time anyway. Lent is a time to give up something that we can recognize as good. Giving up color on your phone does not deprive you of the usefulness or convenience of the device. You can still call, text, check social media, set timers, use maps, and so on.

And yet, the entertainment factor is seriously decreased when your screen is only in shades of gray. It suddenly lacks the pull it has when there are bright colors, including those obnoxious red notifications! So, if you love your phone, but aren't able to give it up altogether for Lent, you may want to put it on grayscale. You'll love it less.

You hate your phone.

Sometimes, you may feel like a slave to your phone. You say you're not going to use it so much or let it control you. You know that ultimately you are in control, and this is just a tool. And then there's a ding and a bright red circle, and you've pulled it out again, just to make sure you aren't missing anything important. And you wonder if you really are in control of this device, or if you are its slave.

There may be times that you recognize you aren't exercising as much self-control as you'd like with your use of your phone. You can grow to dislike how tied you feel to it, knowing that you have to be available in case the school nurse calls (again) to say that one of your kids just vomited on her desk during math.

You may plan to spend your time in a certain way, and it may include important tasks that you can complete on your phone, such as scheduling appointments online. But before you know it, you've not only scheduled the appointment, you've also checked the weather, checked your email, responded to your husband's text, and wait a minute...did you schedule the appointment or not? Distractions are inherent with smartphones, inhibiting our impulse control by drawing our attention elsewhere.

If you've ever bemoaned the necessity or practicality of your smartphone, you may want to put it on grayscale for Lent. It shows a certain detachment or disdain for your phone. You may not be able to get rid of it, but you can put it in its proper place. It's just a phone, a plain, boring phone. So there, take that, phone.

You love God.

You love God, and you want to be more aware of his presence throughout the 40 days of Lent. You want to be more conscious of this season of penance, with constant reminders of preparing for that great feast of Easter. You want to join with Jesus in the desert and focus on what really matters in life. You want to be more attentive to the time that has been given you by God, so you can accomplish all that he is asking of you. You want to spend more time in purposeful prayer during this liturgical season, so that you can be open to the Holy Spirit, ready to receive the graces that come with mortification. You want to recognize that phones, and all those useful apps, belong to the world of the temporary, rather than the eternal world. For your love of God, you are willing to decrease the ease and enjoyment of your phone.

You can make it 40 days.

If any of the above is true for you, you may be feeling convicted and ready to try out grayscale. But what if it's terrible? What if you hate it? What if you find great difficulty in navigating the phone without the visual color clues? What if it doesn't increase your prayer times or decrease distractions? The good news is that Lent is only 40 days. It may be impractical to think of permanently making a switch to grayscale, but it ought to be possible to do it for the relatively short span of 40 days.

Grayscale is not a fix-all for mindless phone use, so some people find it helpful to make related resolutions, such as giving up social media or online shopping, too, or being more attentive and purposeful to designated times of prayer.

When Easter finally arrives, if you decide to keep your phone on color once again, it definitely feels celebratory! It's like a major party happening in your hands, an alleluia ringing out Jesus' resurrection. Having a grayscale phone for 40 days may not have been all you were hoping, or it may have been more than you were hoping, but either way, you will notice a difference at the end of Lent!

Outside the Walls Radio Interview

It was a pleasure to speak with Timothy Putnam about the project Go Gray for Lent. The interview can be accessed at this link:
Outside the Walls with Timothy Putnam

Yes and No of Going Gray for Lent

"Sometimes, I have felt it was like an eye looking at me. and I am always wanting to put it on and disappear, don't you know; or wondering if it's safe, and pulling it out to make sure. I tried locking it up, but I found I couldn't rest without it in my pocket. I don't know why. And I don't seem able to make up my mind."

These are Bilbo Baggins' words in Chapter 1 of The Fellowship of the Ring, as he speaks to the wizard Gandalf about his ring. A smartphone, of course, is not a magic ring, and yet, we may echo Bilbo's words to some extent here. Many smartphone users are always wanting to take out their phone and perhaps "disappear" from whatever or whoever surrounds them: disappearing from the household chores, the work responsibilities, or the strangers in the waiting room. Like a magic ring, a smartphone can be very useful.

Unnecessary checking on phones is not altogether different than Bilbo's wondering if the ring is safe, and pulling it out to make sure.

Sometimes, we recognize the pull that the device has on us, so we put it away from us, only to realize we can't rest without it in our pocket. What if we miss out on something important while it is tucked away in a drawer?

And, like Bilbo wanting to let go of the ring but not making up his mind on it, we often are indecisive  and inconsistent about how, where, when, and why we want to make use of our phones. Even with good intention and practical resolutions, we may find ourselves reaching to our pockets absent-mindedly, like Bilbo with the ring. And we may find ourselves checking our email when we set out to make a phone call!

Going grayscale for Lent is one way of addressing the ambivalence we feel about the pull of the screen in our pocket. It's a resolution that requires changing a setting and nothing more: no active monitoring or maintenance.

Lenten resolutions are penances, and penances always indicate both a "yes" and "no." Going grayscale for Lent is a way of saying no. Grayscale is a no to the brightness and attraction of the screen. It's a way of trying to address the pull of the screen in our pocket. Ultimately, like all penances should be, going grayscale is a way of saying no to ourselves.

It's a way to acknowledge bad habits that have slowly crept into our lives, and to say no to them. It tames an impulse, and reminds that we use the phone as a tool, rather than letting the phone use us, as a magic ring might, exercising control over thought and action. Like a magic ring, our phones were designed to catch our attention, to draw our usage, and to ensnare our commitment. Technology developers seek out and depend upon our desires and uses. Phones and apps were thoughtfully and intentionally designed, not simply to be useful tools, but to be indispensable tools: tools that we may feel we cannot live without. Going grayscale is a way of saying no to this illusion. It aims at detachment, a no to this object that so easily attaches us.

The Lenten resolution of going grayscale is an attempt at saying yes to what really matters. God is our ultimate reality, our beginning and end. This penance helps us to say yes to recollection, conscious choice, and practicing the presence of God. The gray screen seems dull and boring, throwing into relief the vividness of our surroundings, the gift of this life in this world, and the unbelievable beauty of the world to come. The boring screen reminds us to say yes to the people near us, who - whether strangers on an airplane or our own family members - are children of God, with souls! The gray screen is a way of saying yes to ourselves as God's beloved children, capable of using our free will to grow in virtue and cooperate with the abundance of grace given to us by God.

The willingness to go grayscale for Lent shows that we recognize the pull in our pockets and have the courage to say no to that attachment. This resolution also shows that we say yes to what really matters, to serving God in the best way we can.