The Mid-Lent Struggle of Loathing Resolutions

Today is Thursday of the hundredth week of Lent. No, not really, because of course there are not that many weeks in Lent. But somehow, even when the sun finally shines again and the weather is warming up, there becomes a point where Lenten resolutions can feel like kind of a drag. We wonder how much longer we can handle living a life that's missing some of our favorite things.

In the beginning of Lent, there's some initial enthusiasm. We want to be better people. We want to grow closer to God. We want to use our Lenten penance to prepare for Easter. We are inspired by the people around us who share these goals. It may be hard, but we can persevere in those early days because of the beauty we find in the potential of the Lenten season.

Sometimes, we even start to see that habits are formed. Suddenly not eating between meals becomes the default; we don't even think about it that much. That extra prayer time becomes simply a part of our life. We feel like we are growing in virtue, exercising self-control, and living a Lent that will help us rejoice at Easter.

Then, there are other Lenten resolutions that just continue to be challenging...or possibly even annoying.

Going grayscale on my phone is meant to address the sort of mindless impulsivity that can lead me to do unproductive things when I could be using my time better. I'm sure we all have our unique downfalls when it comes to temperance issues and phone use. Mine tend in the direction of online shopping (including that in which I never actually purchase anything) and social media.

For these two issues, going grayscale does seem a direct affront. Online shopping is hard to do without color, and social media just isn't as fun. But grayscale doesn't actually prevent my doing these things, and I can sympathize with people who simply give up online shopping or social media. This approach is an even more direct affront, and possibly it brings better results. Going grayscale does not prevent me from using my phone, it just makes it really frustrating and boring.

This is the time of Lent where I start to struggle with grayscale, wanting to use the triple-click feature to switch into color for one second to check what a photo looks like before I post it. After all, that's more time-advantageous than pulling out my computer (which is still on color), and I don't want to be legalistic about being grayscale. And then, let's be honest, I do start using my computer more during Lent when my phone is on grayscale, not unlike drinking lots of tea if you've given up coffee. It's one of those Lenten resolution workarounds, and I always realize how much more efficient it is to use a computer for certain tasks anyway.

So, going grayscale for Lent is not one of those sacrifices that gets easier. It just starts to get annoying, and I start reevaluating the usefulness of it as a penance. Is it helping me to grow in temperance? Is it helping me to focus more on God during this Lenten season? Is it facilitating extra time for prayer? Or, is it humbling me, making me realize that even sticking to a resolution doesn't guarantee "winning" at Lent?

These questions - however painful - are just the sorts of questions we want to ask ourselves at this point in Lent. It's a great time to renew the interior penitential sentiment that we want to accompany our resolutions. We can pray for God to grant us a sense of compunction. We remind ourselves why we chose such a penance as this; we want to master our phones and not the other way around. Phones are our tools, and we are at God's service in all of our actions. Going grayscale is not an invitation to walk around miserable and come to hate Lent; it is an opportunity to refocus on what matters, to slow down our mind so we can grow in recollection and awareness of our sins and need for God.

Grayscale will continue to be lame for the next hundred weeks of Lent. No, not really, because there isn't that much time left to Lent! Whether we feel like it or not, we are in the final half of this season of penitential preparation. It is time to remind ourselves why we undertook such a Lenten resolution, to "set our faces" toward Jerusalem and what lies ahead - the passion, death, and resurrection of Jesus Christ. It won't make grayscale super-awesome and fun, but renewing our efforts by remembering our purpose will help us to get through these final weeks of Lent in a positive way.

Why You Should Consider Putting Your Phone on Grayscale This Lent

In the Lent of 2018, I decided to do something a bit unconventional as a Lenten resolution. I put my iPhone on grayscale. Now I'm back for another round of going gray for Lent. Let me share with you some reasons why you might consider putting your phone on grayscale this Lent.

You love your phone.

Your phone is great. It helps you stay in touch with family and friends, both near and far away. It is amazing to be able to take a cute picture of your toddler, proud of his latest mess, and send it to your mom in Iowa. It is so convenient to order a new pair of sneakers online for your kid and have them arrive within two days. It is a nice break to check social media and post messages to your friends who are celebrating birthdays that day. It is awesome to set a timer so you can remember to change your load of laundry right when the washer ends. It's so nice to be able to pull up GPS when you get lost on your way to a place you haven't been in awhile. And having access to prayer apps and Scripture on your phone is awesome too.

Your phone is useful, convenient, and yes, entertaining. It is a powerful tool that quickly becomes a part of life. For those of us used to using a smartphone, it may be hard to imagine ever going back to life without one. But the fact that you love your phone is a reason to put it on grayscale for Lent. The purpose of Lent is not to give up sins, as those you should be trying to give up all the time anyway. Lent is a time to give up something that we can recognize as good. Giving up color on your phone does not deprive you of the usefulness or convenience of the device. You can still call, text, check social media, set timers, use maps, and so on.

And yet, the entertainment factor is seriously decreased when your screen is only in shades of gray. It suddenly lacks the pull it has when there are bright colors, including those obnoxious red notifications! So, if you love your phone, but aren't able to give it up altogether for Lent, you may want to put it on grayscale. You'll love it less.

You hate your phone.

Sometimes, you may feel like a slave to your phone. You say you're not going to use it so much or let it control you. You know that ultimately you are in control, and this is just a tool. And then there's a ding and a bright red circle, and you've pulled it out again, just to make sure you aren't missing anything important. And you wonder if you really are in control of this device, or if you are its slave.

There may be times that you recognize you aren't exercising as much self-control as you'd like with your use of your phone. You can grow to dislike how tied you feel to it, knowing that you have to be available in case the school nurse calls (again) to say that one of your kids just vomited on her desk during math.

You may plan to spend your time in a certain way, and it may include important tasks that you can complete on your phone, such as scheduling appointments online. But before you know it, you've not only scheduled the appointment, you've also checked the weather, checked your email, responded to your husband's text, and wait a minute...did you schedule the appointment or not? Distractions are inherent with smartphones, inhibiting our impulse control by drawing our attention elsewhere.

If you've ever bemoaned the necessity or practicality of your smartphone, you may want to put it on grayscale for Lent. It shows a certain detachment or disdain for your phone. You may not be able to get rid of it, but you can put it in its proper place. It's just a phone, a plain, boring phone. So there, take that, phone.

You love God.

You love God, and you want to be more aware of his presence throughout the 40 days of Lent. You want to be more conscious of this season of penance, with constant reminders of preparing for that great feast of Easter. You want to join with Jesus in the desert and focus on what really matters in life. You want to be more attentive to the time that has been given you by God, so you can accomplish all that he is asking of you. You want to spend more time in purposeful prayer during this liturgical season, so that you can be open to the Holy Spirit, ready to receive the graces that come with mortification. You want to recognize that phones, and all those useful apps, belong to the world of the temporary, rather than the eternal world. For your love of God, you are willing to decrease the ease and enjoyment of your phone.

You can make it 40 days.

If any of the above is true for you, you may be feeling convicted and ready to try out grayscale. But what if it's terrible? What if you hate it? What if you find great difficulty in navigating the phone without the visual color clues? What if it doesn't increase your prayer times or decrease distractions? The good news is that Lent is only 40 days. It may be impractical to think of permanently making a switch to grayscale, but it ought to be possible to do it for the relatively short span of 40 days.

Grayscale is not a fix-all for mindless phone use, so some people find it helpful to make related resolutions, such as giving up social media or online shopping, too, or being more attentive and purposeful to designated times of prayer.

When Easter finally arrives, if you decide to keep your phone on color once again, it definitely feels celebratory! It's like a major party happening in your hands, an alleluia ringing out Jesus' resurrection. Having a grayscale phone for 40 days may not have been all you were hoping, or it may have been more than you were hoping, but either way, you will notice a difference at the end of Lent!