Using Facebook as a Force for Good this Lent, Part 3: Fasting

Intro:

The purpose of putting our smartphones on grayscale for Lent is to choose a form of Lenten penance that requires sacrifice while also allowing us to regain an element of thoughtfulness and recollection in our use of these devices, which can distract us from purposeful Christian lives. However, while this Lenten resolution is a good first step, it may not "solve" all our usage struggles.

Perhaps that is why so many people, instead of grayscale, choose other specific resolutions, such as giving up online shopping or social media. At times, we may feel that it the struggles come with impulse control in the little bits of time we have free. We look for distractions on our phone, and find them easily, but we are left feeling that online window-shopping or mindless social media scrolling was not the best use of our time. It lacked a sense of purpose and increased our sense of a lack of impulse control or meaning in our usage.

The question for today is how we might approach Facebook during Lent, using it as a force for good, rather than mindless, time-filling, quasi-entertainment. We consider this question with the traditional Lenten penances in mind: prayer, fasting, and almsgiving and offer concrete suggestions for using Facebook well this Lent, rather than simply giving it up.

Fasting:

The Lenten practice of fasting is, first and foremost, about food. The fasting that we still practice on Ash Wednesday and Good Friday consists of only one full meal and two smaller snacks. Until the Lent of 1967, this fast was kept on all the days of Lent (excepting solemnities). The changes to penitential practice for Lent in the United States now allow for a much broader interpretation of fasting, and people voluntarily choose to "give up" or fast from various foods or items during Lent.

The idea of going grayscale for Lent is about fasting from the color on our screens, and, like the traditional practice of fasting, it allows us to regain a sort of thoughtfulness or recollection that comes from a constant reminder. Every time we see our phones, we recognize that they look different. Many other people choose to fast from social media, such as Facebook, Twitter, or Instagram. There are various good reasons to consider such a fast, as well as other reasons to avoid this fast.

First, it is helpful to recognize that the traditional fasting encourages abstaining from something that is fundamentally good for us; food is necessary for our very survival. Lenten resolutions may allow us to work on sin struggles, but our Lenten sacrifices should not be about "giving up" a particular sin. For example, if we struggle with gossip, we should try to give that up during Lent, but not as a Lenten resolution. Rather, we should always be making efforts to combat that sin, not looking to take a 40 day break from it before we plunge back in.

So, when it comes to Facebook, a good question for examination is whether it regularly causes us to sin or is sometimes a near occasion of sin causing a struggle. If we recognize that we become insensitive, rude, or careless on Facebook, insulting others perhaps, or demeaning them, or using Facebook as a way to make a name for ourself, presenting ourselves as amazing people, then Facebook itself may be an occasion for sin for us, and we may need to give it up - not for Lent, but forever!

However, we may see that Facebook helps us to maintain long-distance relationships with family or friends, to find ways to help those around us in need, allows us to feel supported by others, and sometimes to engage in meaningful conversations on important topics. That doesn't mean we might not sometimes struggle with wanting to make rude remarks or wanting to show off our kids. But, especially if we are using it purposefully and thoughtfully, Facebook does not have to be an occasion of sin, and fasting from such a good may not be the best Lenten resolution for us. It may, rather, contribute to our feeling isolated from others.

Nonetheless, we may still recognize some problems with how we use this "good." Like food, we may turn to it when we're bored for entertainment. We may fill our bits of time with it, absent-mindedly looking through it when we might do other more productive or prayerful things. In such cases, there can be value in adopting some discipline here. In addition to using Facebook as a force for good by intentionally looking for almsgiving and prayer opportunities, we may want to limit our time, by setting a screen time limit on our phones or by purposefully setting aside a set time period designated to social media. We often think in terms of "all or nothing," but sometimes the best solution is, instead, something thoughtful and intentional. If we have our phones set to grayscale, we will already find less pull and enjoyment from social media, such as Facebook. Thus, rather than simply giving up Facebook, we may want to discipline our use of it, making it a force for good guided by the Lenten practices of fasting, prayer, and almsgiving.

Using Facebook as a Force for Good this Lent, Part 2: Prayer

Intro:

The purpose of putting our smartphones on grayscale for Lent is to choose a form of Lenten penance that requires sacrifice while also allowing us to regain an element of thoughtfulness and recollection in our use of these devices, which can distract us from purposeful Christian lives. However, while this Lenten resolution is a good first step, it may not "solve" all our usage struggles.

Perhaps that is why so many people, instead of grayscale, choose other specific resolutions, such as giving up online shopping or social media. At times, we may feel that it the struggles come with impulse control in the little bits of time we have free. We look for distractions on our phone, and find them easily, but we are left feeling that online window-shopping or mindless social media scrolling was not the best use of our time. It lacked a sense of purpose and increased our sense of a lack of impulse control or meaning in our usage.

The question for today is how we might approach Facebook during Lent, using it as a force for good, rather than mindless, time-filling, quasi-entertainment. We consider this question with the traditional Lenten penances in mind: prayer, fasting, and almsgiving and offer concrete suggestions for using Facebook well this Lent, rather than simply giving it up.

Prayer:

Prayer is one of the most basic prayer practices of Lent. Of course, Lent should not be the only time of the year when we make efforts in our prayer life. And yet, it is a special time where we may take on extra or different prayer practices than usual, such as adding a daily Rosary, attending daily Mass, or reflecting on the daily Mass readings. If we are not adding anything specifically, we may try to be more intentional about prioritizing our prayer or using our times of prayer well.

While Facebook may not be the first forum we think of when it comes to prayer, there certainly is no shortage of opportunity for prayer on Facebook. If we have faithful Catholic friends, we have probably at some point, possibly even frequently, encountered prayer requests on Facebook. In fact, even those who are not regular churchgoers will occasionally request prayers or respond to friends' posts by noting that they are praying for them.

Perhaps no lie is so common among Christians as the false promise to say a prayer for someone. The falsehood may not be intentional, but, especially if we are quickly scrolling through posts, we may intend to pray for someone and then fail to do so. Or we may recognize that someone seems to be in need of prayers, even if not requesting them, and we want to pray for them later in the day but forget.

Lent is a wonderful opportunity to use Facebook as a force for good by actually praying for those who ask for it or would seem to benefit from it. And if we find ourselves getting frustrated by friends on Facebook, perhaps for their political postings or unkind comments to ourselves or others, we should make an extra effort to pray for them during Lent. Here are some ideas about how to be more intentional about prayer on Facebook.

First, if someone is requesting prayers, let's pray for them. Stop the scrolling, pause for a minute, and immediately say a prayer. There are many quick prayers that we can say mentally, such as: "Lord, for Michelle as she mourns the loss of her father-in-law and for the repose of his soul: Hail Mary..." Or, "Dear God, for my friend Nicole and her son who has a high fever right now: Our Father..." Again, "For Tom, who was just in a car accident, may his angel keep him safe: Angel of God, Tom's guardian dear..." It is great to choose a prayer in advance, such as the Memorare or, the ancient (and slightly briefer) prayer Sub Tuum Praesidium. If we are prepared, we can easily pause and say a prayer for the person in need, and, then, when we are finished with the prayer, we can comment on the friend's post: "Just said a Hail Mary for you guys. Hope your son gets better soon!" It lets the person know that we really did say a prayer for them!

Second, for those who aren't requesting prayers, but clearly have some need, whether it's because of a bad day in general or a specific challenge they are facing. There are also those who seem to be negative, angry, or purposely antagonistic toward others in their comments or posts. For such occasions, it's probably best NOT to let them know they have our prayers, as that may simply seem to be sarcastic or offensive. And yet, we can still pray for them, using the same procedure as above. Pausing and offering a prayer right then and there takes our concern or frustration and turns it toward God, sharing our worries in a way that can help us to grow closer to God during Lent and maybe also help our friends who are struggling.

Third, if we are incorporating specific prayer practices this Lent, such as a daily Rosary, it is a good idea to keep a list of intentions on a slip of paper in our pocket or on the notes section of our phone. This way we can keep track of our friends in need of prayer and remember them at another time of the day. Praying for others in need is a great way to strengthen the body of Christ, and we will find it easier to pray for friends if we have some written reminder of these intentions.

Finally, what about requesting prayers for ourselves or others? This is usually a good idea, so long as we don't overdo it; some people may weary of constant requests for prayers for ourselves or others.  Asking for prayers should not be a way of seeking attention; we should ask for prayers only if we really desire the prayers of others for a particular situation. If we believe in the power of prayer and know that we have good Catholic friends who will pray for us, it is a good idea to ask for prayers for difficult situations, such as our own loss of a loved one, the serious illness of a child, etc. We also may see benefit in asking for prayers for someone else that we know is in need, but may not believe in prayer or want to ask for prayers so publicly. In such cases, it's good to ask permission, and generally not to name the person if we know they don't want attention this way.

Prayer may not be the first thought that pops into our head when we think of Facebook, but there are many invitations to do so when we are more recollected and intentional in our use of Facebook. We know we have friends facing difficult situations, writing rude remarks, celebrating a birthday, or having a rough day. Rather than zipping through these posts, we can take the time to pause and offer specific prayers for these friends. We can commit to remembering them in our prayer later in the day as well. And we can be willing to open ourselves to others praying for us in our times of need. By embracing this opportunity for prayer, we can use Facebook as a force for good this Lent.

Using Facebook as a Force for Good this Lent, Part 1: Almsgiving

Intro:

The purpose of putting our smartphones on grayscale for Lent is to choose a form of Lenten penance that requires sacrifice while also allowing us to regain an element of thoughtfulness and recollection in our use of these devices, which can distract us from purposeful Christian lives. However, while this Lenten resolution is a good first step, it may not "solve" all our usage struggles.

Perhaps that is why so many people, instead of grayscale, choose other specific resolutions, such as giving up online shopping or social media. At times, we may feel that it the struggles come with impulse control in the little bits of time we have free. We look for distractions on our phone, and find them easily, but we are left feeling that online window-shopping or mindless social media scrolling was not the best use of our time. It lacked a sense of purpose and increased our sense of a lack of impulse control or meaning in our usage.

The question for today is how we might approach Facebook during Lent, using it as a force for good, rather than mindless, time-filling, quasi-entertainment. We consider this question with the traditional Lenten penances in mind: prayer, fasting, and almsgiving and offer concrete suggestions for using Facebook well this Lent, rather than simply giving it up.

Almsgiving:

Fundamentally, almsgiving is about giving money directly to the poorest in need of basic resources. During Lent especially, we see this giving as made possible by our own sacrifices of little comforts that we can give up for a time in order to focus on others. Facebook is currently used for various fundraisers, providing us with opportunities to donate money. However, we can find many other important opportunities simply by paying attention to our friends' situations and needs.

The idea of almsgiving can be extended to include the corporal and spiritual works of mercy, and each day, if we are attentive and reflective as we look through the posts of our friends and acquaintances, we will see openings to perform these works. Just recently, members of my family (including myself) had flu, and my husband posted about it on Facebook. I was moved by a number of friends who reached out to me to offer picking up groceries, dropping off Tylenol, and helping with rides for my children. And I was grateful to the friend who dropped off a meal, groceries, and Tylenol for our family.

Each day, as we scroll through Facebook, we will find people mourning the loss of a loved one, struggling to overcome illness, frustrated by logistics of family life, adjusting to a new baby, or going through some other hard times. Rather than casually passing by these posts, we can use them as a way to practice works of mercy during this season of Lent. To be more concrete, I suggest choosing at least one per week to address off Facebook, in real life, as we might say. Such actions would include sending a real, physical sympathy card or buying flowers for someone who has lost a family member, dropping off food for a sick family or family with a new baby, offering a ride to basketball practice for someone struggling with logistics, or sending some cash to someone who seems to be struggling financially.

There may be times, due to our own family circumstances, where we feel limited in our capabilities to reach out in charitable acts. While mailing a thoughtful card may be a possibility, making a meal or offering to watch someone's children may be untenable. However, during those times (including Lent) where we find such obstacles to physical works of mercy, we can still use Facebook as a force for good by offering encouraging words and making affirming, positive comments that express our concern and support for our friends with current challenges.

Because of Facebook, we often know events, including difficulties, that we might not otherwise hear about it. This Lent is a great time to put into practice the idea of almsgiving, using these posts as openings to reach out, inconveniencing ourselves to assist those in need and support those who could benefit. When we make such a choice in our use of Facebook, we can take it beyond mindless distraction to purposeful penance, using it as a force for good this Lent.